


BTS Pun Drabbles

by whathef_lower (fangirlhaven)



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff, Genderbending, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-23
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2019-05-27 12:46:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15024896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirlhaven/pseuds/whathef_lower
Summary: Just short, unnconnected drabbles that are 1,000 words or less; inspired by dorky puns/jokes. Various ships will occur as well as angst, smut, and fluff.





	1. Lemons | NamKook

**Author's Note:**

> Originally, this was chapter 13, but I figured I might as well rearrange the chapters and post this since the order doesn't really matter.
> 
>     Y'all may not find these puns/plays on words/jokes funny, but hopefully these drabbles will be entertaining at the very least.
> 
> P.S.: This may also be viewed on Wattpad where I have posted it under the same username.

How do you give a lemon an orgasm? You play with it's citrus.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

    "Did you just call me a lemon?" Jungkook raised an eyebrow at Namjoon, feigning offense.

    "What? No! I was just making a joke. Seokjin said that it would make you laugh." Namjoon floundered, embarrassed at his failed attempt at humor.

    He glared at said man sitting at another table not too far away who merely gave him a smile in turn.

    Jungkook laughed, sipping her coffee. "It's fine. A+ for effort. Besides, pussy good, pussy sweet."

    Taehyung's rumbling laughter could be heard across the room from where he sat with Seokjin.

    At the same time, Namjoon choked on his iced Americano. "Oh my God."

    The younger laughed again. "You're really sweet Namjoon. You don't have to try and impress me."

    "I'd rather be compared to a sweet fruit anyways." She joked.

    "Peaches and cream anyone?" Jimin commented, observing the two at his table with Sekojin and Taehyung.

    Yoongi gave him a look. "You're disgusting." Then he went back to watching the two.

    Meanwhile, Namjoon blushed furiously, shocked at how straight forward Jungkook was. Despite how flustered it made him feel, he found himself enjoying it.

     "Thanks, I guess." He coughed.

    "You're welcome. It looks likes your friends have taken a liking to me as well."

    Namjoon followed her eyes to see Hoseok giving them a thumbs up and Taehyung and Jimin not-so-discreetly watching them from another table.

    He groaned. "Ignore my friends. They're a bunch of dorks."

    Jungkook's eyes flitted from her date to his friends at the other table. "Well, I was thinking that maybe you could introduce me to them?" She questioned hopefully.

    It was their fifth date, but Namjoon had yet to introduce her to any of his friends and still tried to go out of his way to impress her.

    Namjoon let out a soft exhale. _She wants to meet my friends. Maybe this isn't going so bad after all._

    "Sure. Of course." He replied, an easy smile on his face.

    "You guys can quit trying to be inconspicuous with your spying and come over here now." Namjoon raised his voice and immediately his friends flocked, sliding into the booth.

     It was a little cramped, but they made do.

     The man with the broad shoulders was the first to introduce himself. "I'm Kim Seokjin, but you can just call me worldwide handsome."

    "And I'm Taehyung, but my friends call me Tae." Jungkook shook Taehyung's outstretched hand, recognizing his deep voice as the one who was laughing earlier.

    Another hand was shoved towards Jungkook and she shook it awkwardly. "The name's Jung Hoseok, but I'm also known as everybody's hope."

   His bright smile was contagious and Jungkook found herself smiling back. "I'm Jeon Jungkook, but I'm sure you know that already."

    Namjoon coughed, feeling left out. "These two are Jimin," he gestured towards the man sitting next to Taehyung who looked a little like an angel if Jungkook was being honest, "and Yoongi hyung."

    Yoongi looked a bit grumpy to Jungkook, but he might have just had resting bitch face. However, his doll like features made him just as attractive as the rest.

    "It's nice to finally meet you all." Jungkook said politely. If she was being honest, she felt somewhat overwhelmed being surrounded by so many handsome men. It was like she was in a harem.

    "The pleasure is all ours. Joonie hyung here never shuts up about you." Jimin piped up, earning a pointed look from his hyung.

    Jungkook cocked an eyebrow, stealing a glance at Namjoon who was blushing once again. "Tell me more."

    "It all started when he tripped over your bag..."

    The night went on like that with his friends telling all their embarrassing stories and Namjoon helpless to stop them. They still made sure to make Jungkook feel included. Maybe they were trying to scare her off, but by the end of the night Jungkook had only found the dimpled man more endearing and she knew she was catching feelings.

    "So that was fun." Jungkook stated as the two stood on her porch.

    He chuckled. "Yeah, if you call public humiliation fun."

   "Watching you get all flustered in front of me was pretty entertaining." Jungkook teased as she fiddled with her keys.

    "Oh, really?" Namjoon quipped, pulling Jungkook flush to him, leaving his hand on her hip.

    Jungkook ran her hands up and down Namjoon's torso. "Mhm. Seeing your cheeks flushed like that...it gave me some thoughts."

    "What kind of thoughts?" His voice was considerably deeper than it had been a second ago.

    Jungkook looked up at Namjoon as she bit her bottom lip, debating on whether or not she should give into those not so PG-13 thoughts.

    _Fuck it. I'm bedding this tall glass of water._

    "Why don't I show you?" She whispered, bringing her lips to Namjoon's in a passionate kiss.

    It wasn't long before they were inside and struggling to get each other's clothes off with their lips still attached.

    Jungkook had to break the kiss for air, panting. "Mm, fuck. As much as I'd like you in me, I'd rather be horizontal than vertical."

    She pushed Namjoon away and shed her dress. "Coming, big boy?"

    Fuck yes, Namjoon thought as he watched Jungkook's ass walk away before he began following the trail of clothes she had left behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this in one sitting and I'm honestly surprised. Please expect more great things to come.  
> (๑•̀ㅁ•́๑)✧


	2. Fine | YoonSeok

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Courtesy of my friend who wanted to impress his friend who has a crush on him by telling her all these cheesy pick up lines.

   Yoongi and Hoseok are just going to the movies, so it's not like Yoongi expected him to come out looking so good.

    "Damn. Are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you." He mumbles aloud as he looks Hoseok up and down _again_.

    He doesn't want to forget this look on him ever and makes a mental note to take a selfie with him later.

    _What did I do in a past life to deserve someone as great as him?_

    Suddenly, a hand is on his forehead and Hoseok's frowning face is in front of him. "Are you sick, babe?"

    Yoongi realizes that he must have been staring for too long. However, he struggles to come up with a coherent response with those red tinted lips in his face. Red has always looked good on Hoseok and even better on his lips.

    He wonders how those cherry lips would look sucking his c-

    "Yoongs?" Hoseok questions with his eyebrows furrowed in worry.

    Forcing those bad thoughts out of his mind before he gets himself all worked up–this is supposed to be a cute date, damn it–Yoongi swats his hand away. "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's hurry up and leave."

   Hoseok hums in agreement. "Okay, I've been looking forward to Deadpool 2."

   Yoongi watches as his own personal ball of sunshine puts his shoes on, getting lost in his thoughts.

    _Just look at him. Looking like a whole 8 course meal and then some._

    As Hoseok bends over to tie his shoe, Yoongi barely holds back a groan at the sight of his ass in those jeans. If Hoseok didn't hurry up, he might just cancel their date and have him for dinner instead.

    "Like what you see?" Hoseok teases, walking over to Yoongi.

    "You're damn right." The shorter one gruffs as he grabs the taller one's tight ass.

    Hoseok lets out a little yelp and Yoongi smirks, stealing his lips in a heated kiss.

    With much will power, Hoseok forces himself to part from Yoongi's soft lips. "I'd really like to see Deadpool now."

    This time Yoongi did groan. "Deadpool can wait. I'm hungry."

   "No," Hoseok starts feebly, weak against Yoongi's neck kisses, "you can wait. There will be snacks at the theatre."

    Yoongi pulls away from the brunette's neck. "You're the only snack I want."

    In spite of himself, Hoseok finds himself getting turned on at those words. "Fine, but you owe me a movie afterwards."

    Yoongi smiles triumphantly. "Deal. Now come here and let me feast."

   Hoseok smiles back, kissing Yoongi once more. Deadpool could wait.


End file.
